Q. Is the correct way to eat string cheese by peeling pieces off or biting into it like a candy bar?

A. Nice try with the trick question. The proper technique depends on the circumstances. If you are rushed for time or one hand is otherwise occupied or filthy, by all means, eat it like a candy bar. But be sure to demonstrate some couth. Don’t shove it down your throat like your the World’s Most Overeager Cheese Dildo Swallower.

Now if you have time, by all means, string and piece that baby out. Make it last like a crack addict with half a rock and no money left.

Problem solved. You’re welcome.

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