I did head back to the table for a minute while they finished cleaning Six. I told Katie how perfect he was and what a good job she did.

Eventually the nurse got Six cleaned up enough that they wrapped him up like a little burrito and handed him over to me. I took him over to Katie and did my best to show her her little boy while she was still lying flat on the table. I won’t presume to speak for her, but showing a mother her newborn child for the first time is one of the coolest things I have ever done. I was honored to do so.

C-section babies are kept on the opposite side of the maternity ward at Methodist and they let me hold him all the way back to the room. We settled in a bit and then I went out to the waiting room to tell Dan and Cindy and MDAWGS that everything was OK and I’d come get them soon. (I was told later only 55 minutes had passed, which seems like an incredibly short time for the world to change.)

And then we settled in and started figuring out how to be parents. In the last 14 days I have been pissed on, shit on, puked on, and trolled by our little boy. Sleep is hard to come by some nights. And I don’t get upset over any of it.

I know I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: This little boy shouldn’t exist. We weren’t supposed to be able to have kids. We were a very high risk pregnancy. We found out six months in. Our high risk doctor calls him a “Take Home Baby.” He was born, did a few days in the hospital with Katie to recover and then we took him home. He never even went to the NICU, which is a common occurrence for babies with diabetic mothers. But Katie was dedicated and put in the work, and we were both rewarded with the ultimate prize of the Take Home Baby. So I don’t mind one bit that I don’t get as much sleep as I’d like, or that my game time has decreased, or that my needs will always be second place to his.

But if I was to disregard all that the sleep, the needs, all of it… sometimes he smiles at me.

Sometimes he furrows his little brows and I see myself in him.

Sometimes he crinkles his nose and I see Katie in his precious little face.

Sometimes he opens his big eyes when he is laying on my chest and he looks at me for a long time before sleep overtakes him. I look back and I talk to him. I tell him I am his Daddy.

So, no, I don’t mind.